Monday, September 6, 2010

Wake me up when september ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends

Like my father's come to pass
7 years has gone so fast
Wake me up when September ends

Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars
Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are

As my memory rests
But never forgets what I lost
Wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends

Ring out the bells again
Like we did when spring began
Wake me up when September ends

Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars
Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are

As my memory rests
But never forgets what I lost
Wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends

Like my father's come to pass
20 years has gone so fast
Wake me up when September ends
Wake me up when September ends
Wake me up when September ends


September is the time i lost you
the season where my tears ran dry
the memory drenched in pain and loss

2 years has gone so fast
more years to come
where you will live in my heart and memory forever
each year this day
will i whisper a prayer
may it turn to a letter addressed to heaven
telling you
i miss you, dad.

wake me up when september ends...

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Love that never let go





Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I'm caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won't turn back
I know you are near


And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?


Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me



And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We'll live to know You here on the earth


Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You




Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Prove to me

i know how great thou art
i know how You calmed the raging seas
i know how much blood you have shed for me

Yet

i do not just want to know
i do not just want to hear
about how great is that God in the bible
about how great is the ever-forgiving love
that forgives even

a sinner
a wretch
the worst person in the world
like me
at the cross
i bow my knees
i challenge
i want to see
i want You to prove
let me see and experience

that You dont just live in Bible and sermons
that You are not just a silly belief which people thinks
i have fallen into
that You are real

by changing me
now.

Let me see
how thy grace
will change a lousy person like me.

Then shall i
my life
be a testimony for You
for the rest of my days
as long as life endures.

Friday, September 4, 2009

What it takes

for a man to remember his promise

to a sometimes willful and over-demanding young girl

that he promised to get her a laptop which she has always wanted

even at the time when he knows his days are numbered

even it takes up not much that’s left of him

stretching that will that is still holding strong

within the frail body

he still wants to fulfill her dream like he always do…



What it takes

for a man to remember just that set of number

when he barely could couldn’t recognize anyone else that moment

lying on that snow-white hospital bed

he still want to give her a call

even it takes so much energy just to say a few simple words

to tell and assure her he is fine when he is not

even it takes up the pride and ego that means everything to a man

to beg and plead just so he could her voice in hospital where calls are forbid especially in an ICU

Just so he could tell her

what he hopes and wants for her life

before the cancer cells clear his path

his way

to the heaven…



That was the last time he talked to her

That was the last time she ever heard his voice…



All it takes...

is just a father’s love to his most precious princess...

To never fail his promise

To keep her in his mind and heart

even until the last moments…



365 days have passed...



she thought that being away from home for too long

being a strong and independent girl as always in everyone's eyes

the memories of him

that seem to linger lesser and lesser in her mind

she might and she will forget about him one day…



Just then she found out


it will never be.


She will never lose it
she will never forget it
she will never exchange it for anything.



Just because

its part of her.



366th day onwards

I wish I could tell you I don’t miss you anymore

I won’t be trying hard to recall the vague memories we had before

for I have decided to keep you in my heart wherever I go...


The day when I put on my graduation robe

The day when I walk into a crowd to serve as a pharmacist

The day when I walk the down the aisle to give my hand to him

The day when you will have a little one asking about his grandpa

i want you to be there

right there with me in my heart

to live every moment of my life with me…


I miss you,
I really do.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Change Changing Changed

Every morning when i wake
i wait for You
Every night when i find rest
i found my rest in You

You're the one who's shaping me
to be more like You
i lose myself till there is nothing

i can, i will and i am changing
till it's You who i see in me
i stand, i kneel and i'd do anything
till it's You who i see in me

Unto You i commit this life again
every inch of me is to magnify You


Start in me
Start with me Lord
because i yearn to see
it too will start


in him
in her
in them
in the small family
in the small town
in the small land
in the small world
that never stops spinning

in Your big big hand...

i want

change changing changed

Thursday, August 13, 2009

有人说,不要告诉她
我爱你
因为对她没有用。

原来
爱可以以价值计算。

原来,
最美的我爱你,
可以变得这么没意义。

原来
爱,好痛。


爱你的人,永远都是伤你最深的人。
是因为爱,所以才伤害吗?

人,好矛盾。
因为爱你,所以伤害你。
这是为你好。

我没有喊痛,不代表我没有感觉。

眼角的眼泪
终究
会被风而吹干。


Daddy,我累了。
可以暂时
不要再当你坚强的女儿
不要再忍着眼泪
不要长大


可以让我在你的怀抱
躲一下马?

我会好起来的
在眼泪干后。。。

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Forever Legacy

As i looked back
the very first post when this blog was born
its about him,
or rather Him
what He hoped for in tears as He looked down.

Heal the World
one song that truly melted my heart to it
each word speaks of the hope
hope of a generation
hope of a lonely soul that it will be heard one day
hope when finally guns are put down and hands are shaken again
hope of a sick world that needs healing.

Now
the one who sang it no longer sings
but the hope always remain
for he too hope for a better world
for his children
for this world which he has to bid farewell first.

He has made a difference,
have us?

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Happy Fathers Day, dad...

Daddy if there is one thing you should know
let it be that i love you so
no matter how tired you walked home from work
no matter how late you come home.

Daddy if there is one thing you should hear
let it be that i miss you always
the times you held me in your hands
the times you picked me up when i fall

You may not be the one that change the world
or save the human race
but Daddy you should know still
Yu're the one that makes me smile
the arms i run back to
You're the champion
the only champion of my heart.

Daddy if there is one thing i want
it would be another chance to tell you
You're the hero that took my nightmares away
the one that paint my skies with the
brightest colors

I don't mind of there is no gifts or presents
or when you're upset and angry
what truly matters to me
is that you first loved me so
that will never change
You're the champion, the champion of my heart.

How bout the times i fail you
still you believe in me
How bout the times i hurt myself
you cleaned my wounds and
When the rain came pouring in
you kept me safe and dry
what more could i ask of you
when i have the best of what you could be

by TLJ

Daddy if there is one thing I'd want
it would be another chance to tell you
Happy Fathers Day.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Sing for You

Say the word and I will sing for You
Over oceans deep, I will follow
If each star was a song
And every breath of wind, praise
It would still fail by far to say
All my heart contains
I simply live,
I simply live for You

As the glory of Your presence
Now fills this place
In worship, we will meet You face to face
There is nothing in this world
To which You can be compared
Glory on glory, praise upon praise
You bind the broken hearted
And save all my tears
By Your word, You set the captives free
There is nothing in this world
That You cannot do
I simply live,
I simply live for You

No longer my race to run
but Your will to be done
for i am saved by grace
living by grace now
this is a life
lived simply for You alone...


Tuesday, April 14, 2009

That Friday...

At 3pm, it rained. Rained so heavily. The rain today feels different. In the midst of wetness and refreshing breeze it brings, it is mixed with a string of sadness, loneliness, that breaks the heart of all who feels it. I am reminded…


Six hours one Friday,

was all that it takes,

for the son of Man,

Lamb of God,

to be nailed on the cross,

bearing all the sins and shame.


That moment,

clouds turned dark,

the Father looked away,

heaven wept,

and the angels were silent,

looking at that man hung on the cross.



“It is finished.”




The end of sins

end of His work here on Earth

end of His cup of sufferings

end of death,


for our Lord,


has paid them all.




Love is the color of the blood stained on the cross at Calvary…



Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Happy Niu Year ^^

The celebration of festival
Can mean so much more than...


The cleaning up job
Which often comes with the non-stop grumbling yet so much satisfaction :P


Or the new n nice nice clothes from top to bottom
(mum always complain they make a hole in her pocket :P)



Or...
the abundant of unlimited delicacies
(which often make me gain afew kgs after tat =.= )

It means...

the meeting up n catching up with loved ones
who are so faraway yet so close in hearts
having so much fun n energy even after staying up the whole nite


And with the addition of a new member in the family


so goes with the addition of joy n smiles plastered on every face


Double joy

Double time together

Double prosperity

Double blessings



in this New Year!!!

Mooo~~~

DaddyGod,thank U for such cute n fabulous family i have =)

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Happy Birthday Lord


Light of the world
You step down into darkness
Opened my eyes let me see
Beauty that made this heart adore you
hope of a life spent with you

And here I am to worship
Here I am to bow down
Here I am to say that you're my God
You're altogether lovely
Altogether worthy
Altogether wonderful to me

King of all days
Oh so highly exalted
Glorious in heaven above
Humbly you came to the earth you created
All for love's sake became poor

Here I am to worship
Here I am to bow down
Here I am to say that you're my God
You're altogether lovely
Altogether worthy
Altogether wonderful to me

I'll never know how much it cost to see my sin upon that cross
I'll never know how much it cost to see my sin upon that cross


Because of Your great love,
You humble Yourself and came down to us
As a light that shines
So beamingly in the darkness...

How beautiful, is the name of Jesus,
How innocent and blameless, is the baby in the manger,
How wonderful, is the man he is going to grow up to be,
How indescribable, is His love...

Happy Birthday,
my Lord, my King, my Savior
my everything

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Christmas is a time to love


Christmas is a time
Christmas is a time
Christmas is a time to love...


We often start to worry,
and people get upset,
when things all don't go right on Christmas day.
What we should remember,
in all the push and shove,
is Christmas is a time to love.


Maybe things don't sound right,
or look the way they should,
or maybe they're not perfectly in tune.
It really doesn't matter,
let's keep our eyes above,
Cos Christmas is a time to love.


Christmas is a time

Christmas is a time

Christmas is a time to love.




Cos Christmas is a time to love...




Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Beautiful Whisper

***
The faces that Moses had begged to see – was forbidden to see – was slapped bloody (Exodus 33:19-20). The thorns that God had sent to curse the earth’s rebellion now twisted around his own brow...


“On your back with you!”



One raises a mallet to sink in the spike. But the soldier’s heart continue pumping as he readies the prisoner’s wrist. Someone must sustain the soldier’s life minute by minute, for no man has this power on his own. Who supplies breathe to is lungs? Who gives energy to his cells? Who holds his molecules together? Only by the Son do “all things hold together (Colossians 1:17) The victim wills that the soldier live on – he grants the warriors continued existence. The man swings.


As the man swings, the Son recalls how he and the Father first designed the medial nerve of the human forearm – the sensations it would be capable of. The designs prove flawless – the nerves perform exquisitely. “Up you go!” They lift the cross. God is on display in his underwear and can scarcely breathe.


But these pains are a mere warm-up to his other and growing dread. He begins to feel a foreign sensation. Somewhere during this day an earthly foul odor began to waft, not around his nose, but his heart. He feels dirty. Human wickedness starts to crawl upon his spotless being – the living excrement from our souls. The apple of his Father’s eye turns brown with rot.
His Father! He must face his Father like this!


From heaven the Father now rouses himself like a lion disturbed, shakes his mane, and roars against the shrivelling remnant of a man hanging on the cross. Never has the Son seen the Father look at him so, never felt even the least of his hot breath. But the roar shakes the unseen world and darkens the visible sky. The Son does not recognise these eyes.


“Son of Man! Why have you behaved so? You have cheated, lusted, stolen, gossiped – murdered, envied, hated, lied. You have cursed, robbed, overspent, overeaten – fornicated, disobeyed, embezzled, and blasphemed. Oh the duties you have shirked, the children you have abandoned! Who has ever so ignored the poor, so played the coward, so belittled my name? Have you ever held your razor tongue? What a self-righteous, pitiful drunk- you, who molest young boys, peddle killer drugs, travel in cliques, and mock your parents. Who gave you the boldness to rig elections, foment revolutions, torture animals, and worship demons? Does the list never end! Splitting families, raoing virgins, acting smugly, playing the pimp – buying politicians, practicing exhortation, filming pornography, accepting bribes. You have burned down buildings, perfected terrorist tactics, founded false religions, traded in slaves – relishing each morsel and bragging about it all. I hate, loathe these things in you! Disgust for everything about you consumes me! Can you not feel my wrath?”


Of course the Son is innocent. He is blameless itself. The Father knows this. But the divine pair have an agreement, and the unthinkable must now take place. Jesus will be treated as if personally responsible for every sin ever committed.


The Father watches as his heart’s treasure, the mirror image of himself, sinks drowning into raw, liquid sin. Jehovah’s stored rage against humankind from every century explodes in a single direction.


“Father! Father! Why have you forsaken me?!”


But heaven stop its ears. The Son has stares up at the One who cannot, who will not, reach down or reply.


The Trinity had planned it. The Son endured it. The Spirit enabled it. The Father rejected the Son whom he loved. Jesus, the God-man from Nazareth, perished. The Father accepted his sacrifice for sin and was satisfied. The Rescue was accomplished.


Taken from Boy Meets Girls by Joshua Harris
Originated from When God Weeps by Steven Estes and Joni Eareckson Tada

***


Always thought that the bloody scene on the cross is something that couldn’t be more familiar about. Of how the most innocent blameless man being hung there for dying for our sins, of how each nail was pierced into his flesh nailing to it sins that we commit, of how every drop of blood that dripped wash and wipe away with it the ugly and gruesome of our past, of how a Father chose to turn away when His most beloved and precious Son cries out to Him.


Yet im reminded. I could have never know it enough. I could have never picture it perfectly of every pain He had gone through for me. I could have never figured out who am i to deserve such grace when i am supposed to pay the price for my own sins, He paid it for me.


Why the Cross?


Because sinners have no other hope...


Why the Cross?


Because it is the unassailable proof that we can be forgiven...


Just as im asking wondering why should i deserve such ocean depth of love and forgiveness, i heard Him whispered,


“It’s not what you have done, it’s what my Son has done for you.”


How wide
How deep
How great
Is Your love for me


I would never stop to be amazed by You...

Friday, November 28, 2008

Season in His hands

For everything there is a season,
A time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die
A time to plant and a time to harvest
A time to kill and a time to heal
A time to tear down and a time to build up
A time to cry and a time to laugh
A time to grieve and a time to dance
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones
A time to embrace and a time to turn away
A time to search and a time to quit searching
A time to keep and a time to throw away
A time to tear and a time to mend
A time to be quiet and a time to speak
A time to love and a time to hate
A time for war and a time for peace

Eccelesiates 3: 1-8


Daddy,
Sometimes it takes so much
To yield to Your perfect plan
To the Time that You hold in Your hands.
But I’m learning
Learning to submit
With all i am.
Learning to let You
Slowly heal the wounds
That hurts.


Its the season again
A time to take hold and a time to let go
I’m letting go
And place it in Your hands
The string of kite that im not capable of holding
Will i get to hold it back again
I do not know
But one thing im confident of
It will soar high
Really high
With You...

A time for rain and a time for rainbow
Hope that will never fade
Hope that will only appear after every storm
Yet, right now
I just want to sit alone
In the season of crystal bead of raindrops
That beat out a beautiful melody
Every drops that fall on me...


“For three things will abide forever- faith, hope and love- and the greatest of these is love.”
1Corinthians 13:13


Daddy, let me remain let me hide in Your love forever...





Friday, October 24, 2008

Smell of Rain

A beautiful story, a beautiful sharing...



A cold March wind danced around the dead of night in Dallas as the doctor walked into the small hospital room of Diana Blessing. She was still groggy from surgery. Her husband, David, held her hand as they braced themselves for the latest news.

That afternoon of March 10, 1991, complications had forced Diana, only 24-weeks pregnant, to undergo an emergency Cesarean to deliver couple's new daughter, Dana Lu Blessing.
At 12 inches long and weighing only one pound nine ounces, they already knew she was perilously premature. Still, the doctor's soft words dropped like bombs.



"I don't think she's going to make it," he said, as kindly as he could.



"There's only a 10-percent chance she will live through the night, and even then, if by some slim chance she does make it, her future could be a very cruel one."






Numb with disbelief, David and Diana listened as the doctor described the devastating problems Dana would likely face if she survived. She would never walk, she would never talk, she would probably be blind, and she would certainly be prone to other catastrophic conditions from cerebral palsy to complete mental retardation, and on and on.



"No! No!" was all Diana could say.



She and David, with their 5-year-old son Dustin, had long dreamed of the day they would have a daughter to become a family of four. Now, within a matter of hours, that dream was slipping away.


But as those first days passed, a new agony set in for David and Diana. Because Dana's underdeveloped nervous system was essentially 'raw', the lightest kiss or caress only intensified her discomfort, so they couldn't even cradle their tiny baby girl against their chests to offer the strength of their love.


All they could do, as Dana struggled alone beneath the ultraviolet light in the tangle of tubes and wires, was to pray that God would stay close to their precious little girl. There was never a moment when Dana suddenly grew stronger. But as the weeks went by, she did slowly gain an ounce of weight here and an ounce of strength there.


At last, when Dana turned two months old. her parents were able to hold her in their arms for the very first time. And two months later, though doctors continued to gently but grimly warn that her chances of surviving, much less living any kind of normal life, were next to zero, Dana went home from the hospital, just as her mother had predicted.

Five years later, when Dana was a petite but feisty young girl with glittering gray eyes and an unquenchable zest for life. She showed no signs whatsoever of any mental or physical impairment.


Simply, she was everything a little girl can be and more. But that happy ending is far from the end of her story.




One blistering afternoon in the summer of 1996 near her home in Irving, Texas, Dana was sitting in her mother's lap in the bleachers of a local ball park where her brother Dustin's baseball team was practicing. As always, Dana was chattering nonstop with her mother and several other adults sitting nearby when she suddenly fell silent. Hugging her arms across her chest, little Dana asked,



"Do you smell that?"


Smelling the air and detecting the approach of a thunderstorm, Diana replied,


"Yes, it smells like rain."

Dana closed her eyes and again asked, "Do you smell that?"


Once again, her mother replied, "Yes, I think we're about to get wet. It smells like rain."





Still caught in the moment, Dana shook her head, patted her thin shoulders with her small hands and loudly announced,


"No, it smells like Him. It smells like God when you lay your head on His chest."


Tears blurred Diana's eyes as Dana happily hopped down to play with the other children. Before the rains came, her daughter's words confirmed what Diana and all the members of the extended Blessing family had known, at least in their hearts, all along.


During those long days and nights of her first two months of her life, when her nerves were too sensitive for them to touch her, God was holding Dana on His chest and it is His loving scent that she remembers so well.







The love of God is like the ocean, you can see its beginning, but not its end. Sometimes we dont see Him, but one thing for sure, He is always there, cradling us in His arms just as how a Father will lovingly carry His children, protecting them from the storms and thunders.


Tat is the warmest and strongest arms the world could not offer.








Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Till we meet again at Home

Specially dedicated to a special man in my life

6 Sept 2008 ...

I hold them in my hands,

So cold, so pale.

The coldness of the palm told me,

No amount of warm tears,

could bring back the temperature of the hands again,

no amount of calling,

would make ur eyes open and look at me again,

no amount of grief n brokenness,

can make the sound of heart thumping to be heard again.

I bowed down,

For the last time i speak to you face to face,

“Pa, I will take good care of mum and sis.
I will be a daughter that will do you proud.
We shall meet again in heaven, ok?
A promise.”

For the last time i pray for you,

“God, i am surrendering this man into ur loving hands.
Bring him to a place free of suffering and pain.
Take him home, a place to where he belongs.”

Last kiss, last goodbye.


8 Sept 2008 ...

Last journey,

I completed it with you till the very end.

The body turns to dust and past will be carried away by wind,

But the soul has finally found his eternal shelter to rest.

That evening, it rained.

Rain that reminded me that its time to wash away sorrow and tears,

And start on a journey without you.

“You are a joyful man, your daughter wouldn’t be too bad either.”


Yet the heart that misses will always remain.


One day, i know,

I will meet both my Fathers again at Home.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Patient in Patience


Maybe to a patient

to the family that stays by side

every moment

what it requires

what it takes

is not just extra patience

to take up what may seems so unfair

but also extra love

to make up what disease has taken away

extra courage

to be prepared of what is unseen ahead

extra hope

to continue trusting that prayers whispered every nite

will be answered even when it takes a longer time

and

extra faith

to hang on even what is left on the palm

is helplessness...



"Sometimes if the ships of prayer do not come home speedily,it is because they are more heavily laden with blessings."


Lord,im still waiting for the ship to reach its destination, to the place where it belongs to.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

The Crowd or The Cross

As we walk down the path

The crowd's cheering

Their sound of persuasion

Their hands that waved signalling us to follow

So luring...

So attractive...

So tempting...

Have our eyes been so obsessed by the it

That they no longer can see or notice

The little cross ahead

The logs where bloods were once shed

The trees where all the sins were paid n forgiven

The place where the mission of a carpenter is finished

The point where we are given a chance

to start again.

Tis is where we belong...

The most simple yet most difficult question,

The Crowd or The Cross,

Have u decided?

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Flash



Couldn't stand the Friday afternoon in Akasia


So off we go





Me n Betty




Two young ladies



Exploring the new ways of using our camera lens





to capture what human eyes always missed




in a place that no one will actually take the effort to stop





But if ever one day




u slow down ur steps



to pause awhile





maybe u will discover





the spirit of flower that speaks



the eye that blinks



the rhythm of flowing water that sings






and the hands of God that creates =)